Before I get into this blog post, I have to explain the title. ‘Come to Jesus Meeting’ is an old expression I learned while working as a Labour Representative with General Motors. My Union guy always said this when it was time to have a real honest conversation. You get the good, the bad, and the ugly out on the table, then figure out what you need to move on. I have used it ever since.
Every now and then, I find it beneficial to have a Come to Jesus Meeting with myself. A gorgeous day this summer provided the impetus for just that… and the wisdom that follows.
You see, when I need guidance, I seek it out. I intuitively know when it’s time for a fresh perspective. Of many tools in my treasure chest, I follow Vedic Astrology and connect with the messages and energy of the moon cycles, as well as the rhythms of nature. I have chosen to work on a focused level with these practices over the last year and have found tremendous insight – it provides an additional level of awareness, higher consciousness. It was only fitting that while I was on holidays this summer, I would take a trip up to the Birla Centre. The centre has been on my radar for a while but the time was never right, until now.
It was a beautiful Saturday morning. My partner and I drove the quaint country roads from Ottawa to Cheneville, QC, feeling relaxed and at peace.
I connected with my Astrologist and Palmist immediately. It seemed she felt the same. As soon as she looked at my chart and my hands, she shouted, “I know why you are here Paula, oh Paula — the timing is perfect!”
If you’ve been following my blog, you know that I’ve talked a lot about playing to your strengths and that I believe embracing your shadows is equally important. We all have them, the light and the dark. In that moment at the Birla Centre, I found myself at a crossroad. The shadows I thought I had dealt with long ago we’re facing me dead on in the heart centre — or shall I say, at the ‘head of my palm’.
‘Paula, get out of your head. You think too much. You do too much. You worry. Fear is getting in the way.‘ Then there’s the self doubt; the feeling that I’m not doing enough.
As I receive this information, I know it’s not new; I’ve been working on these themes for years but we are all like onions, made of many layers — “hello, subconscious!” — and the thoughts that reside within those layers are still very, very powerful. In fact, “many of our choices or actions are driven by past patterns which is impacted by information that’s stored in our subconscious – we don’t know what we don’t know.” Fascinating.
I’ve learned how to watch my thoughts — I meditate, I practice yoga and I work hard at my practice — but it was all coming back to me.
‘Paula, you work too hard. Go have fun and relax. Be kind to yourself, love yourself, and be compassionate.‘ These old shadows were alive again; a surprise and an incredible challenge.
I receive wonderful feedback about the work I do, about my personal and professional character –“caring, nurturing, strong, intuitive, innovative and passionate, a natural leader who inspires and knows how to make things happen.” So why the self doubt? Just when I thought I had the answers, another level opens, a greater depth, another layer that offers more learning and inspires greater change. This is the beauty of the journey for each and every one of us and I’m grateful that I have the courage to be vulnerable enough to face it.
“The amount of inspiration and mastery gained is directly related to the amount of courage invested.” Lance Secretan
I could have wallowed in the pit for a while on this one, believe me, or reverted to past patterns, but instead I held my head high. I kept grounded and made a choice to create mindful, positive change, to continue on the path, be true to myself and live out my Destiny … my purpose. Let’s be honest, this work isn’t easy but you know what? I’m learning and so are you. We have the power to make our lives easy. I’m grateful for this precious human life and to be a part of this beautiful fabric that interweaves all of us.
Shadow work aside, the Astrologist and Palmist had amazing things to say about my character and the work I do here at Uplift! She even compared my charts to Mother Theresa and Barack Obama (I know, large shoes to fill, but this Leo with Scorpio rising is ready to roar!).
So, I commit to take yet another step toward surrendering and letting go. I get out of my way yet again, so that my brilliance and genius can shine forth. The practice continues, finding a natural flow and balance between action and non-action, effort and effortlessness, riding the waves of the breath, being in the moment and natural rhythms of nature.
After many years of work and evolution of my soul, it was time to have a Come to Jesus Meeting — a Meeting with my Self. I shared this with a dear client of mine recently in one of our one-to-one coaching meetings and she asked how she could have a Come to Jesus Meeting, whether you talk to yourself out loud or do anything specific. I told her, it’s whatever way works best for you.
In my case, I self-reflected and wrote out about it as part of my daily gratitude practice, then I took it to my yoga and meditation room and had a face-to-face with myself using my best quiet, calm, I-mean-business voice. As I continue to witness my thoughts, listening to the whispers and paying attention to the cues and hints, following one connection to the next, I can feel myself soaring. When, old patterns rear their ugly head, and they do, they are much less powerful and frequent.
Honestly, I’ve been singing from the rooftop ever since. I’m a Lion, hear me roar! I also sent myself an inspiring card To: Me, From: Me. After all, we need to be our best and brightest cheerleaders. We can listen to the approval and accolades of others until the cows come home but won’t internalize that positivity until we ourselves believe it to be true.
Have a Come to Jesus Meeting with yourself. Take those steps toward believing in your potential and Continue to Shine, my friends. As always, let me know if I can help facilitate your journey. I’m here.
Love and Light. Paula